Reading through Yelp reviews is very interesting. The following are some comedic snips:

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• “Everything was perfect. Ironically, my wife liked everything I ordered much more than her own orders. It’s the only reason I can’t give 5 stars – but I just had the best experience”

• “My girlfriend ordered the clam linguine–it was so salty for her she actually poured her water into her pasta to dilute it. True, we could’ve sent it back, however, we were hungry and tried to really get into it”

• “That damn artichoke haunts my dreams”

• “Don’t expect full depth of flavors here”

• “Cheeto-looking things set on the table. Two mayonnaise dips. Ho-hum. Cheeto things are hushpuppies (weiner dogs?), all long, greasy, hard and crunchy – no soft, flavorful centers”

• “This place is BAWLIN’ yo. Chicken nuggitz be crispy like you never SEEN. I tasted one and I was like “WHAAAAT! Are you serious?”

• “Weird meth smell”

• “is great for when you want vaguely Mexican flavored food-like items to shove down your throat”

• “The cashier took my order swiftly and even asked if I wanted a pump of flavored syrup in my coffee. Be still my beating heart! During the short wait for my food, any staff I happen to make eye contact with offered up a smile, which I swear made me think they were pumping hallucinating drugs out through the air system!”

• “He served me his hot cheesy burrito and we took turns eating each other’s chaco tacos. After tossing my taco salad, he slapped me across the face with his chalupa. It was magic.”

• “I don’t know what could have saved limp, dispiriting yam dumplings, but it definitely wasn’t a lukewarm matsutake mushroom bouillon as murky and appealing as bong water.”

• “Every once in a while, something genuinely remarkable would arrive, as if from another kitchen.”

• “Its rottenness is both inherent and cosmetic; it is culinarily insipid and morally insidious.”

• “Chicken Caesar pizza… looks like what you’d expect if a cook emptied a bottle of parmesan dressing onto a pallid spa cracker, applied a squeeze bottle swirl of romaine pesto, and let the musky crumbs from a pre-shift meal of KFC waft down over that pizza. It is profoundly awful”

• “The risotto with scallops is where hope goes to die”

Do you have plan for responding to Yelp or Google reviews either positive or negative?